Facing mortality

If this takes me out, I'll end my run on Earth with an incredibly lonely stretch of road and more struggle than not; and definitely not the end of the story I'd hope to write for myself. I've squandered time just being a deer in life's headlights, afraid to want anything good for myself and sabotaging any potential success. Afraid to live and afraid to die. My internal narrative paralyzing life. Floating in a bubble that love doesn't penetrate. Fuck